Where Does The Bible Say Forgive And Forget

Alright, let's talk about that giant book we call the Bible. You know, the one with all the stories and rules and, well, a lot of other stuff. Today, we're going on a little treasure hunt. We're looking for those magic words: "forgive and forget." Sounds simple, right? Like finding a cozy armchair and a good cup of tea. But sometimes, finding things in the Bible is more like a scavenger hunt where the clues are a little bit… mysterious.
So, we're going to dig in. We're going to see if we can pinpoint exactly where it tells us to unleash our inner saint and just poof make all those pesky wrongs disappear from our minds. Because, let's be honest, sometimes forgetting feels like the hardest part of the whole "forgiving" gig.
We’ve all heard the phrase, haven't we? "Forgive and forget." It’s tossed around like confetti at a wedding. We hear it when someone’s been wronged. We hear it when we’re supposed to be the forgiving one. It’s the ultimate peace-out move, the grand finale of reconciliation.
But here’s a little secret, and maybe it’s an unpopular opinion, but bear with me. When you actually open up the Bible and start flipping through the pages, looking for the exact phrase "forgive and forget"… well, it’s a bit like looking for a specific unicorn in a herd of very polite but ultimately un-horned horses. It’s just not there. Not in those exact words, anyway.
Now, before you start throwing your favorite worship songs at me, hear me out. This isn't to say the Bible isn't all about forgiveness. Oh no, it is dripping with forgiveness. It’s like a water park of grace, honestly. The emphasis is HUGE. But the "forget" part? That’s where things get a little more… nuanced.
The Forgiveness Fiesta
Let’s talk about the part that’s definitely in there, loud and clear: forgiveness. This is the star of the show. We see it in the teachings of Jesus, which, let’s face it, are pretty much the main event for a lot of Bible readers.
In the book of Matthew, chapter 6, Jesus gives us the Lord's Prayer. And in that prayer, we say, "and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors." See? It’s right there. We ask for forgiveness, and we say we've forgiven others. It’s like a cosmic quid pro quo, but with a lot more love involved.

Then there's Luke 17:3-4. This is where Jesus gets pretty direct. He says, "Watch yourselves. If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. And if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns back to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him." Seven times! That’s a lot of repenting and forgiving. It’s like being stuck in a time loop of apologies and grace.
And in Ephesians 4:32, it’s put this way: "Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you." This is a pretty powerful connection. It links our forgiveness of others to God's forgiveness of us. It’s a pretty high bar, but also incredibly encouraging.
So, yes, the Bible is all about extending forgiveness. It’s a core principle. It’s the golden rule, with extra sparkle. It’s about letting go of grudges, about showing mercy, and about understanding that we all mess up sometimes.
The Elusive "Forget"
Now, let’s circle back to our missing unicorn: the "forget" part. While the Bible strongly encourages forgiveness, it doesn't explicitly command us to erase memories like a faulty hard drive. And honestly, is that even possible?

Think about it. If someone deeply hurts you, and then they sincerely apologize, the act of forgiving is something we can consciously choose. We can decide to let go of the anger, the resentment, the desire for revenge. That’s a choice. That's the "forgive" part.
But forgetting? That’s like trying to un-ring a bell. Or trying to un-spill milk. It’s a memory, a scar, a lesson learned. It happened. We remember it.
Some people might argue that when the Bible talks about God forgiving our sins, it implies a form of forgetting. In Isaiah 43:25, it says, "I, I am he who blots out your transgressions for my own sake and will not remember your sins." This is a beautiful picture of God’s complete forgiveness. He doesn't hold onto our mistakes against us.
But is it a literal amnesia? Or is it a complete cleansing? It’s more about the consequences and the relationship. God doesn't bring our past failures up as a reason to condemn us. He doesn't hold them over our heads.

And when we're told to forgive as God forgives, it’s about our attitude and actions. It’s about not dwelling on the offense, not allowing it to fester and poison our hearts. It’s about choosing to move forward, rather than replaying the hurtful event in our minds on repeat.
Why the "Forget" Might Be Tricky
So, if the Bible doesn't explicitly say "forget," why do we have that popular phrase? Perhaps it’s an interpretation, a way to sum up the feeling of complete forgiveness. When you truly forgive someone, the hurt loses its power. It’s not that the event never happened, but it no longer controls you.
Maybe "forgetting" in the context of human relationships is more about not letting the memory define the person or the future. It's about seeing them through the lens of forgiveness, not just the lens of the past hurt.
It’s like when you learn a tough lesson. You don't forget the lesson, because it helps you make better choices. But you don't necessarily replay the painful experience over and over again. You remember the outcome and use it for growth.

This is where it gets interesting. The Bible is all about transformation. It’s about healing. And sometimes, the healing process means we don’t need to keep the wound wide open in our minds. Forgiveness is a powerful act of healing.
So, while you might not find a chapter and verse that says, "Thou shalt forget all the terrible things that have ever happened to thee," you will find endless encouragement to forgive. And maybe, just maybe, in the act of truly forgiving, the sting of the memory fades a little. It loses its sharp edges. It becomes a story, rather than a fresh wound.
It’s like the difference between a vivid nightmare and a distant, slightly hazy bad dream. The event might still be there in the archives of your mind, but it doesn’t have the same grip. And isn't that a kind of forgetting? A forgetting of its power over you.
So, the next time you’re trying to forgive someone, remember all those verses about extending grace. Focus on letting go of the bitterness. And if the memory lingers? Well, that’s just part of being human. The Bible’s given us the tools to deal with it, to heal, and to move forward with a heart full of grace, even if our brains are still working on the "forget" button.
It's a journey, for sure. And sometimes, the most important lessons are the ones that aren't spelled out in bold, but whispered in the quiet moments of reflection. The Bible is full of those whispers, pointing us towards a life of love and forgiveness. And that, my friends, is a pretty good place to start.
