How Do You Really Know If Someone Loves You
Alright, gather ‘round, you love-struck and lovelorn folks! Let’s talk about that big, fat, fluffy, sometimes terrifying, often confusing thing we call love. Specifically, how do you really know if someone’s got the real deal for you? I mean, beyond the starry eyes and the dramatically delivered Shakespearean sonnets (though those are nice, if a tad excessive for your average Tuesday). We’re talking about the nitty-gritty, the stuff that makes your gut do a happy little samba, not just a polite waltz.
So, you’re dating. Or you’re married. Or you’re in that weird in-between phase where you communicate exclusively through cryptic emojis and shared Netflix queues. And you’re wondering, "Are they really into me, or am I just convenient?" It’s a question as old as time, or at least as old as the first time someone invented the “we’re not together but we hang out a lot” arrangement. And trust me, there are more fake love stories out there than there are bad dating app profiles. (And that’s saying something, folks. I once matched with a guy whose entire bio was just a picture of his cat wearing a tiny hat. Impressive, but not exactly a love-manifesto.)
The "Is This Real Love or Just Really Good Food?" Test
Let’s start with the basics. Does this person listen? And I don’t mean the kind of listening where they nod along while secretly planning their grocery list. I mean, really listen. Like, remember that obscure band you mentioned once, three years ago, and then surprise you with tickets to their reunion tour? That’s commitment. That’s the kind of stuff that makes you think, "Okay, they might actually be paying attention to my ramblings about the existential dread of choosing the right avocado."
And speaking of food, because let’s be honest, food is a universal language, right? Do they share their fries? This is a critical test. If they guard their fries like a dragon guarding its hoard of gold, run. Unless they’re a professional fry-guard, in which case, maybe re-evaluate. But for 99.9% of the population, sharing fries is a sign of deep affection. It’s like saying, "I value your happiness, even if it means I have slightly fewer crispy potato batons." This, my friends, is true love. Or at least, a very strong friendship that might evolve into love. You know, after a few more shared fry incidents.
A surprising fact for you: Studies have shown that sharing food can actually increase feelings of trust and connection. So, next time you offer your last bite of cake, you're not just being generous, you're practically conducting a love experiment. You’re basically a culinary Cupid!
The "They See Your Weird and Love It Anyway" Factor
Okay, so they’re a good listener and a generous fry-sharer. What else? Do they accept your quirks? And by quirks, I mean the things that make you, well, you. Are they the person who doesn’t bat an eye when you spontaneously break into a full-blown dance routine in the supermarket aisle? Or the one who finds your obsessive habit of alphabetizing your spice rack endearing, rather than deeply concerning? Because if they do, that’s a sign they’re not just tolerating you, they’re celebrating your beautiful, messy self.
My friend Brenda once admitted to a guy she was dating that she sometimes talked to her houseplants. Not just a little “hello,” but full-on conversations about her day. His response? He bought her a tiny watering can shaped like a flamingo. A flamingo! That’s not just acceptance, that’s a statement. It’s saying, "Your weird is my wonderful." And isn’t that what we all secretly hope for? Someone to embrace our inner flamingo-lover?
Think about it. We all have our little eccentricities. Maybe you sing off-key in the shower. Maybe you have a collection of rubber ducks that rivals a small museum. If someone genuinely laughs with you about it, and not at you, that’s a huge win. They see the full package, the good, the bad, and the slightly alarming collection of porcelain cats. And they’re still there, holding your hand. That’s not a coincidence; that’s a carefully cultivated, deeply felt connection.
The "They've Got Your Back, Even When You're Being a Complete Buffoon" Test
Love isn’t just about the romantic dinners and the whispered sweet nothings. It’s also about the messy stuff. Does this person stick around when you’re having a bad day? Like, a really bad day, where you’re convinced the universe is personally out to get you and all you want to do is eat ice cream straight from the tub while watching reruns of a show you secretly hate? Do they offer a shoulder to cry on, or just a conveniently placed box of tissues and a silent understanding?
This is where the rubber truly meets the road. Anyone can be around when things are sunshine and rainbows. But it’s when the metaphorical storm clouds gather that you see the true strength of a bond. Do they help you navigate the rough patches, or do they conveniently develop an urgent need to “go out” and “find themselves” (usually in a different zip code)?
Let me tell you a story. My uncle once tried to assemble an IKEA bookshelf without reading the instructions. It was a disaster. Pieces were flying, screws were scattering, and he ended up with something that looked more like a modern art installation than a bookshelf. His wife, bless her patient soul, didn’t yell. She just calmly walked in, surveyed the chaos, and said, "Well, that’s… interesting. How about we order pizza and tackle this together tomorrow?” That’s love, my friends. That’s the kind of person who sees your epic DIY fail and instead of despair, offers pizza and a plan.
This level of support is crucial. It's the foundation upon which lasting love is built. It’s knowing that even when you’re at your absolute worst, someone is still there, holding your hand, ready to help you pick up the fallen pieces (and perhaps the rogue allen wrench).
The "They Make You Feel Like You Can Conquer the World (Or At Least Conquer Your To-Do List)" Vibe
Finally, and perhaps most importantly, does this person make you feel good about yourself? Do they inspire you? Do they see your potential, even when you can’t see it yourself? True love isn’t about making you feel dependent; it’s about empowering you. It’s about having a partner who cheers you on from the sidelines, who believes in your dreams even when they seem a little outlandish. It’s about that feeling of, "Yeah, I’ve got this. Especially with them by my side."
Think about the people who make you feel like you can achieve anything. Are they also the people who genuinely love you? It's not a coincidence. Their belief in you can be a powerful catalyst for your own self-belief. They see the best version of you, and their love helps you strive to become it. It’s like having a personal cheerleader who also happens to be your soulmate. Pretty sweet deal, right?
So, the next time you’re wondering if it’s the real deal, don’t just look for grand gestures. Look for the quiet moments, the shared laughter, the understanding glances, and the unwavering support. Because sometimes, the loudest declarations of love aren’t spoken at all. They’re just lived. And trust me, living it is way more entertaining than any rom-com. Now go forth and observe! And maybe share some fries while you’re at it.